Anger Management: What Triggers Your
Anger?
In order to develop good anger management techniques, you must
first understand what provokes anger, and the body’s natural response to anger. Anger is precipitated by the body’s
natural chemical responses to increased physical arousal, emotions, and accompanying behaviors, that result when a
person feels threatened, or perceives a threat or loss. The threat does not necessarily have to be a threat of
personal, physical harm. It can be a threat to their self-esteem, when they believe their feelings are challenged
or discounted by another.
The body naturally responds to any perceived threat by producing adrenalin to prepare
for "fight or flight." How a particular person responds to these threats is due, in large, to how they have been
conditioned as a child or learned later in life, whether with good anger management techniques or negative ones.
Many abuse victims are conditioned to respond violently, and learn verbal, mental, or physically abusive behaviors
from others, and never develop positive anger management techniques. Every person alive has triggers that set off
their anger.
Here are the most common reasons people become
angry:
- Threats or perceived threats to their body or
property
- A threat to their values (disagreeing with something someone
is doing, such as kicking a dog, or not following the rules)
- When someone insists they do something they don't want to
do
- When someone hurts or betrays them, and they feel a loss of
trust
- When they attempt to escape guilty feelings over something
they do not want to feel or admit to themselves
- When they believe their feelings are discounted, and their
sense of self esteem is compromised
- When expectations are not met (realistic, or unrealistic
expectations) and they don't get their way
Recognizing what provokes your anger, or what pushes your buttons,
is the first step toward implementing good anger management techniques. Instead of exploding, or reacting badly,
try to recognize the signs that you are getting angry, such as:
• Heart Pounding
• Sweating, especially sweaty palms
• Tunnel vision
• Fist or jaw clenching
• Buzzing sound in your ears
• Headache or dizziness
When you are able to recognize the symptoms of your anger when they
begin, you are much more likely to walk away. Once the initial adrenaline rush of anger passes, you are much more
likely to react with proactive, good anger management techniques, such as discussion, or simply distancing yourself
from the people or events you know will provoke your anger.
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